The last time I met an artist I blogged about it on MYSPACE

And seeing as Myspace currently lives in the belly of the apocalypse:

I met a man. In a slow Californian drawl he told me that he was an artist:

Me: "What was the last thing you drew a picture of?"

Him: "An alien, doing this" (grabs crotch).

Me: "What was the last thing you painted a picture of?"

Him: "I painted lines whilst I was doing lines."

Me: "Did you use masking tape?"

Him: "I did, yes."

Me: "Have you ever seen Eddie Van Halen's guitar?"

Him: "I have, yes."

Me: "Did your painting look like Eddie Van Halen's guitar?"

Him: "Well, there were similarities, but there were also differences."